Dark Matter.
You know...
The physics phudge phactor
Conveniently used (by scientists)
When things in the universe
Don’t add up.
I wonder if I could use
Dark Matter
When things in MY universe
Don’t add up?
Like...
I’ve been trying for a while
To reconcile
My checkbook...
“Dark Matter -$5.39”
There!
Now it adds up!
I step onto the bathroom scale.
“Cookies + ice cream cone + barbecue...
Doesn’t add up to THAT much!
Must be Dark Matter-
The ethereal material
Is weighing me down.”
I pull in too close
To the right-hand garage wall.
Again.
My husband says,
“Your visual perception is out of whack.”
“No.” I say, “It’s Dark Matter.”
“It distorts garage gravity, you know.”
Ahh...
I think I’m catching on
To this fudge factor thing.
Just wait ‘till you see
How I use Dark Energy!
.
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5 comments:
Interesting poem, have you considered publishing it in a science-fiction magazine?
You poking fun at dark matter can't diminish my excitement about it and all it implies. The first anti atom was recently constructed, briefly, we're on the edge of something big!
I did laugh but.
"How much for the drink?", asked the proton.
"For you, no charge", replied the bartender.
Neutron. The patron wasn't a proton, but a neutron. Has to be for the joke to work... *laughs*
Ooooops, indeed it does. I was listening to an article about anti particles, and the idea of an anti proton struck me as funny, the word must have stuck in my mind.
Actually, the humour in the unabridged version of this joke is in having a proton and a neutron walk into a bar, giving them different accents so they become a parody of the priest and the rabbi, or the Scotsman and the Englishman, the punch line is the anti climax.
I'll never tell a joke again!
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